Fringe: The Formula

September 24, 2008 at 2:25 pm 7 comments

I’ve discovered the formula for that television show, Fringe.

Here is an episode:

1. Weird, ghastly thing happens to a person or group of people, loud horn/strings section plays sustained (but intensifying) note as it heads into the first break.

2. Hot, talented Australian woman hangs out, gets phone call about ghastly incident. She gathers the team.

3. Cut to crazy old kook scientist being fascinated by something like a cellphone (even though he will do something later in the episode like take pictures out of a dead eyeball using a top-secret high tech camera).

4. Team shows up at ghastly scene… questions abound!

5. Crazy old kook realizes that ghastly scene is just like an experiment he did with Professor so and so way back in the day. Perhaps they should find him/the files/the experiment to see if it has any bearing on ghastly incident.

6. Hot Australian looks hot, Australian.

7. Team knows the problem, but they are lacking one key bit of evidence! Fortunately crazy old kook has an idea of a highly experimental but imaginative way to retrieve information. Crazy old kook’s son is flabbergasted. It will never work!

8. IT DOES WORK!

9. Team finds bad guy/thing, but all the questions aren’t answered.

10. Hot Australian girl throws boomerang, slams a Fosters and blows a kiss at the screen.*

* Robert wishes

If you’ve spoken to me before about television, you know how I feel about the format and the way it uses (manipulates) the viewer into drawing out simple stories into 6 seasons worth of cliffhangers and silly romances. But hey, I’m watching this show at work. Also – I have a crush on the hot Australian.

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Entry filed under: Aww crap!.

Let’s talk beer this gun’s a frozen light gun

7 Comments

  • 1. alex  |  September 24, 2008 at 2:33 pm

    It will never work!

  • 2. alex  |  September 24, 2008 at 2:34 pm

    IT DOES WORK!

  • 3. Charley  |  September 24, 2008 at 3:01 pm

    The cliffhanger in your description was: Where did the boomerang go?!

  • 4. Kiala  |  September 24, 2008 at 6:13 pm

    Still, as a federal agent,I feel she should wear her hair up more often.

    And pencil skirts. Those too. WIth heels.

    I fell asleep during last night’s episode.

  • 5. melissa lion  |  September 25, 2008 at 6:10 am

    Last night I was up knitting and watching this show on Hulu and I saw her blow you a kiss too! It was crazy. Or wait, maybe that was the old crazy doctor guy…I don’t know I was looking at my stitches.

  • 6. Tom Rabbit  |  September 30, 2008 at 8:37 pm

    In supplement to my comment on your Burnett post: see “House”. Thank you.

  • 7. Robert  |  September 30, 2008 at 10:45 pm

    Here is the middle reply – in exact opposite of your responses!

    I don’t know what House is, other than the object I desire to own (along with a sizeable garage). If House isn’t on Hulu and it doesn’t involve either a hot Australian or an angry 5-star chef… I don’t watch it. Me and television have a funny relationship.


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