I fought the law…

April 22, 2008 at 10:36 am 7 comments

… and we both won?

Long story short – I got to pay 180 dollars (the original fee) for a ticket that had ballooned to almost 800 dollars due to a number of reasons. One, they recorded my birthday wrong (5 months later), and they misspelled my last name as Heydon. Whoopsy! So I went to court, sat through the lines and whatnot and finally got in the courtroom.

We had to sit and watch a ten-minute video of our Constitutional rights, then the bailiff reiterated the key points of the video, and then the judge came out and said these things again. He said “I want to be clear – when I call your name, you come up here and say one of three things. Guilty, Not Guilty, or No Contest. If you come up here and don’t say one of these three things, I will tell you to sit down and you will spend the next 3 hours here.”

So the first guy goes up and says “Guilty.” Gets his ticket reduced and leaves. Took about 10 seconds. The next guy comes up and says nothing. There is a silence and everyone is looking at the guy. The guy looks at the judge and says “YES.” That was his plea… yes. He pleaded yes. He was told to sit back down. This happened to TWO people by the time it got to me, and there were only about twelve people in front of me. I couldn’t believe it.

Anyway, that was all done and it took me about two and a half hours start to finish. Two people tried to cut in front of me and I SHUT THAT DOWN!

In other news, I have a comma problem. I comma the crap out of things. It only seems to be on this blog, and perhaps it is because I speak with commas and I’m trying to write in my common voice. However, I’ll go back through a post and delete about 300 commas per post! So I’ve decided that the next 5 posts I will try and write without ANY COMMAS AT ALL. I’ll prefix these posts with COMMA PROBLEM. And I won’t use any dashes/hypens/etc. Because I don’t write this blog to be professionally edited (of course) and I don’t edit my posts with my Journalistically Trained Mind (c) because this is just general blabbing. But the commas… the commas… the COMMAS!


Entry filed under: General Blabbing, Los Angeles. Tags: .

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  • 1. dave  |  April 22, 2008 at 11:20 am

    Court sucks. The judges have been doing the job so long that they’ve completely lost touch with reality. All they can see are the written regulations of the law and they expect all answers to fit into neat categories like Guilty, Not Guilty, and No Contest. As if most situations in life can be explained that easily. Also, don’t fear the commas, embrace them, as they are helpful, and necessary. Semicolons, on the other hand, can suck it.

  • 2. melissalion  |  April 22, 2008 at 1:46 pm

    I’ll take your commas. I need them.

  • 3. Sis  |  April 22, 2008 at 2:00 pm

    Isn’t it amazing that the Judge requires everything just so, but when they (the court) makes mistakes like your birthday and name it still all your fault and you pay.

  • 4. Sis  |  April 22, 2008 at 2:01 pm

    Oh, by, the, way, this, is, sis, #2,,,,,,,,,,,,,

  • 5. JustinS  |  April 22, 2008 at 3:48 pm

    I hear that’s what Hemingway did. Just went through and replaced all his commas with periods.

    And whiskey.

    And buckshot.

    So maybe commas aren’t so bad after all.

  • 6. alex  |  April 22, 2008 at 4:28 pm

    I’ve never been to Court, with the exception of the time I hustled my way out of Jury Duty. More of a gentle shuffle, actually. Although I was certain there was no way out of Jury Duty, as I had heard stories from those that had fought hard and failed, I nonetheless appeared before the Clerk to plead my case. I was in college and had something like 6 essays due that semester. I humbly offered this to the Clerk as my extenuating circumstance. I waited for her to laugh. Without blinking, she said I was off the hook. And that was that.

    Years later, I was in attendance at an Alumni happy hour-thingy, where the above topic came under discussion. As my only experience with Jury Duty is getting out of it, I told the aforementioned story, as I felt it was perhaps school-related and therefore perhaps Alumni-related. Without blinking, the fellow across from me said that anyone who skirts Jury Duty should be escorted to the town square so as to be publicly hung.

  • 7. Robert  |  April 23, 2008 at 12:59 pm

    We all agree!

    Court is for suckers. And commas. And clerical errors. And pretentious uber-patriotic Alumni.

    But not whiskey and buckshot.

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