it could happen to me, it could happen to you

November 23, 2006 at 5:45 am 1 comment

Tomorrow is Thanksgiving. I have funny feelings on this holiday. I’ll have some of those mash potatoes, though… please.

It is my day to catch up on catching up.

Bad news.. it says the high temperature is supposed to be a paltry 66 degrees. And overcast. I’ll swim anyway, because that’s how I rock.. I was just hoping for some of that high-80’s weather we had a few days ago.

I’m listening to Captain Beefheart’s “Tropical Hot Dog Night,” and man.. that night sounds awesome!


Still on the lookout for those perfect pair of Jack Purcells. If you see them, reader, let me know won’t you?

Wow.. I wish I had more to talk about. Since it is technically my Friday, I should be out drinking, right? But you have forgotten, reader! I’m on day 4 of no booze, which isn’t anything because I only drink on the weekends anyway. I look forward to waking up and not feeling like my body is rejecting itself.

Someday it will snap for monkeys.. we will wake up and they will be driving cabs and shining shoes and creating the newest hottest cellular telephone. And we will all look at each other and say “what happened?” I don’t want to live until that day, no siree! By the way, I want to start using “Hooray” more often. It is underused. Bring it back with me, reader!

If you ever throw a crappy dance party, and all the sudden you run out of crappy techno dance music, and everyone has stopped dancing and they are staring at you.. frozen.. I know what to do! Throw in that DVD of the television show “Alias.” From what I’ve been hearing through my bedroom wall… it is nonstop techno action!

I think about this Friday.. I think about being out on my Vespa and seeing a weird toy in the intersection. I slow down so I don’t hit it, and I realize it is one of those Elmo dolls! I try to get out of the way, but two minivans driven by crazed mommies slam into either side of me in a desperate attempt to get the toy. As I lay dying.. all I see is that Elmo doll dancing and giggling. WHAT A NIGHTMARE! Reader, I care about you. Stay indoors on “Black” Friday.

Christmas Eve? Christmas EVIL!!! Los Angeles is full of beautiful women:


This whole outfit doesn’t make sense for a number of reasons. I wish you could have been there with me to see it in person. I was flabbergasted.

I visited my friend Avi last night, and we talked and had “tea” (it’s like water, but flavored) for a few hours. Then her roommate got home. I then realized I was outnumbered! Two Jews to one non-Jew! We all wrestled and ate bagels and hummus as we spun the dreidel. Just kidding. But it was a great evening, nevertheless.

Speaking of the “holidays,” while I was present shopping last weekend, there was already Christmas music on. My ears were going crazy! I wish I could have listened to my iPod, but I didn’t bring it because I didn’t anticipate shopping for two and a half hours.

MORE BELT BUCKLES!

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mergle bergle missed opportunities

1 Comment

  • 1. Robert  |  November 23, 2006 at 6:19 am

    Also.. no matter how much I drink, or no matter how much I “free associate” and “get into characters,” I never turn into a crazy hate-spoutin’ racist. Weird, right?


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