oh no

marriedtothesea.com

Long Songs

I love this song – it’s so true!

On my commute to work today, “We Won’t Get Fooled Again” came on whilst my iPod was a-shufflin’! The song lasted 1/3 of my commute!

Depending on traffic, it usually takes about 25 minutes for me to get to the office from my house. (Also depending on the amount of time I longingly look out to the ocean, and think about how the sea turtle doesn’t need to sit in front of a computer to live, and how dolphins are so free etc. etc.)

I could only think of two songs that would last my entire commute, and both would eventually drive me batty. “Batty.”

Sonic Youth “The Diamond Sea” – The short version is very nice, but the long version can be great it you are doing something other than driving a motorcycle. Otherwise the constant clash of noise and feedback could make you accidentally pop a wheelie!

The Velvet Underground “Sister Ray” – Could you, dear reader, endure a half hour of Lou Reed saying “she’s sucking on my ding-dong”? COULD YOU?

I leave it to you, my dear reader, to name some more 20+ minute songs.

pass the sugary tea

“cause in a chemical world, it’s very very very cheap”

I’m playing catch up from January – I just ordered three 45’s from the Happy Jack Rock Records single club, as well as the last Robert Pollard release “Superman was a Rocker.” I had to catch up because he is releasing another album on his new record label soon. Also, a new Psycho and the Birds release, which I’ll just wait to pick up somewhere used.

You can download tracks off of Bob’s recent releases right here. If you are a first time Robert Pollard solo album listener, I recommend “Circle Saw Boys Club,” “Dancing Girls and Dancing Men,” and the “Wrinkled Ghost” demo, which may be one of my favorite things of all time.

REM is releasing a new album sometime this year.. and I’m utterly apathetic. First off, they are using Jacknife Jones or whatever his name is that produced the last few U2 records (BARF) and frankly, their last studio release was a limp sausage. I didn’t even pick up their last record which was a 2CD live concert.

ANYHOO I’d like to talk burritos some more. I had a breakfast burrito today because I was a little hungry. That is 6 burritos, ladies and gentlemen. Tomorrow will be the end of burrito week.

Is it wrong to be strong?

I worked on my bike for many hours last night. I won’t bore you with the details here. ELSEWHERE SOON.

Posts.. becoming.. nonsensical. No… purpose.. or.. theme!

AND I LIKE IT

burrito week!

From last Saturday until today, I’ve had a burrito every single day. Let’s break it down, shall we?

Burrito Saturday: Some Jesus burrito place over by Jim’s apartment. I don’t know the name exactly, but I’m pretty sure it had something to do with Jesus. Mainly because the place said “Jesus” on every surface. The burrito was (hangover) delicious, so I’ll score it a 7 out of 10.

Burrito Sunday: Miss Garcia’s in Culver City. I had eaten there before, and this time wasn’t too bad, but it wasn’t really twisting my noodle. The chips were bland, and there was loud Oscar news blaring on the television behind me. But it was too windy to eat outside. I’ll give this burrito a 5 out of 10.

Burrito Monday: I went to an old Oregon favorite: Taco Time! I had my standard, the Veggie Burrito. This was pretty delicious, and the Taco Time mild sauce really adds a lot. I’ll give this burrito a 6 out of 10.

Burrito Tuesday: Running out of places to get a burrito, I went to Chipotle. I hate Chipotle. I got a chicken burrito, and it was humongous, but the proportions were all wrong. And I pony up a buck fifty for guacamole, and they put this little dab of it on there. I give Chipotle’s burrito a 2 out of 10!

Burrito Wednesday: ??!?!??! Where am I going to go? I will try making my own burrito at Whole Foods today, then it can only be my fault if it is less than anything but a 35 out of 10.

Update: I indeed made a burrito of my own choosing at Whole Foods. It was delicious. I totally overloaded it with Guacamole and I used black eyed peas instead of black or pinto beans, and brown rice. Look, I’m going to give this burrito a 9 out of 10 – only because it cost 8 bucks and it made me way too full (a correlation?)

I like burritos lately.

I miss “Burrito Amigos” in Eugene, or as me and my “south of the border” roommate Gaby used to call it, “Little Donkey Friends.” Eugene had so many damn burrito places.

year of scruff

As you can tell, I have completely given up on what to put for the titles on this thing. I just make up random stuff.

Last night I went and saw “Charlie Bartlett.” It successfully made me feel very old. It was so-so.

Later that night, my friend Lindsey locked herself out of her apartment. She lives on the second floor, so I jumped up on the back of her roommate’s SUV (who was in Las Vegas) and tried to climb onto her balcony. The roommate’s dog was there on the balcony, and thankfully not trained to attack. But he was trained to lick. So I’m struggling to get over the balcony, which I am now high-centered on, with a dog jumping and licking my face. My balls were also in trouble of getting squished on the metal railing.. but I can’t find a place to put my damn foot down! AHHHH!

I finally got over the balcony and opened the apartment. The moral of this story is: A CAT WOULD NEVER DO SUCH A THING! Especially to a guy struggling on a second floor balcony to either get over safely, get his balls squished, or fall six feet down on his back to land on an SUV roof and subsequently the ground.

Rascals!

Then I went home, did laundry, read a book and fell asleep. It is pretty hard living this rock star life.

And finally, to continue the awesome Kids in the Hall theme going on over at Face of the Cookie, here is one of my favorite KITH sketches ever:

falling off the edge of the earth

As I enter the fourth or fifth hour of sitting in my room with the door closed, surrounded by the contents of my closet and boxes.. I realize that I am probably going crazy.

You read it here first.

I have a new blog I’m setting up for a “project” that I’m hoping to do in a few months. It will be a big trip. More on that later.

Anyway, back to going crazy. This last 2 weeks I’ve had a giant bag of laziness tied on my legs. I’ve never felt so… lethargic. Not sure what the deal is here.

I took a great ride today for about an hour, mostly around Santa Monica and Venice. I originally left the house just to get some food but I couldn’t figure out what I wanted to eat. I finally decided on Mexican food, but had no idea where to go. I drove around and around. I finally settled on a place someone took me once – but it wasn’t as good that time.

Ummm….

Let’s see here.

Ok.

Los Angeles Jukeboxes

In a word?

They stink.

They all have Back in Black, that one Sublime album, and The Eagles Greatest Hits. Most are 3 songs for a dollar, but some are TWO songs for a dollar.

Then those fancy internet jukeboxes are retarded, because some cost a freaking DOLLAR to download the song and listen to it, and then it isn’t available to listen to at regular price the next time you visit!

So I’m opening my own bar in my living room. I have an extensive jukebox with hundreds of good records, and the listening is free. Join me, won’t you?

The Movies – When I Was in ‘nam

“When I was in ‘nam.. we partied in Saigon”

Dear Bartender

Be sure to save any opinion you have about Vespas and scooters in general until after I’ve closed my tab out and signed for tip.

And shut up about your screenplay.

elite dreams!

Last night I dreamt that I bought a Honda Elite, but it turned out not to be the 80’s-tacular Honda Elite like this:

It was a curious 3 wheeled enclosed car – and it was awesome! About the size of a scooter, but one seat in front and two in back. Air conditioned, heater, etc. I was really surprised and sort of elated because it is supposed to rain today.

Well, I woke up and it is raining pretty good, and I sort of wish I had that enclosed Honda Elite from my dream – if only for one morning.

Oh yeah, bonus: it had a built in breathalyser. Not joking. State of the art.

how could life be so good?

Music starts about one minute in.

day off day off

It is my day off and I’m home bound! I am patching two holes in my motorcycle’s mufflers, and they need about 15 hours to set properly.

I’m also futzing with my Vespa’s gastank, so it will be a little while before I can ride that tonight.

So I’m taking the time here at home to COMPLETELY CLEAN THE APARTMENT, as well as drink lots of lime soda.

It really is a dog’s life.

UPDATE: AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!

I’m going damn STIR-CRAZY!

I wanted to go play pool, then remembered I couldn’t take my motorcycle. Then I thought about going to the Viper Room for a show, but my scooter would get stolen in Hollywood in about 13 seconds.

AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!

Walking to somewhere… anywhere now.

in the middle of the ocean

This weekend was full of weekend!

Saturday night – some serious Jenga action. Behold:

Notice Charley’s cavalier attitude toward the TOWER of timber that could collapse on him any moment. This is the same face Custer and Napoleon made.

The focus present in Yvonne’s eyes would only be half as impressive if there weren’t delicious Triple Ginger Snaps just inches away from her other hand (which we all know is all but useless during the removal and placement of Jenga blocks).

Then the next day I wasted the morning (Sunday typical) but high-kicked the afternoon by taking a shitload of stuff to Goodwill and then working on my bike. I did this:

I removed the tank so I could work on the petcock (snicker). It was leaking gas out of one of the little tubes (snort snort) but I removed it and cleaned it, rebuilt it, etc. Now it works like a champ. A replacement would have cost 50 bucks and I love that I can just take these things apart and rebuild them.

OH YEAH. Before I did all this, I made a little camera mount for my motorcycle and took out the Canon I bought to do some shooting. The footage came out ok… the vibrations at low speed are not kind to the footage. I’m in the process of capturing / editing the stuff down, so maybe this week I’ll post it.

Ha! It is only 6:30, the night is young and so am I. And I have tomorrow off. Robert wins.

four years?

Overachievers.

marriedtothesea.com

fish heaven

I woke up this morning and my fish Penumbra was dead.

I blame myself.

Rest in peace, Penumbra! I’ll never have another animal like you. You were a red, feisty fish… named Penumbra.